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Tom Miller, Wikipedia-listed Gainesville Florida performance artist will be enduring a six-hour marathon of every studio album recorded by The Eagles. At the conclusion, he will decide for America once and for all whether or not The Eagles suck.
"Many people have a strong opinion one way or the other about the Eagles," said Miller, "...and people need to just take a step back and let me decide for them. Only I can decide this for the American people."
Miller cites the following reasons why he alone can make this decision for America:
1.) "I'm a musician, and I know what it takes to write both wonderful and horrible songs. I've done both."
2.) "I'm a Gainesville Florida resident, and one of the founding members of the Eagles was born in Gainesville, Florida, and another member relocated to Gainesville for a time in 1964. This uniquely connects me to whether or not this music sucks."
3.) "Based on my research on Google, nobody has managed to officially sit and listen to all these songs in a row. I'll be the first person in the history of Google to actually actively listen to and evaluate every single Eagles song from all of their official studio albums."
4.) "If I don't make this decision for everyone in America, the fight will continue, but I will take on the struggle if it will accomplish peace. And I am not afraid to endure six hours of The Eagles. In fact, I'm eager to make the sacrifices necessary to subject myself to this band."
Inspired by Donald Trump's "I alone" message, and also the scene in the Coen Brothers film, The Big Lebowski where The Dude is thrown from a taxi cab because he couldn't stand the Eagles, Miller hopes to finally bring to an end the Eagles gridlock which has plagued fans and foes alike.
WHAT? Miller Endures Six Solid Hours of Eagles Music (He will listen to every studio album by The Eagles and render a decision, song by song, tallying each number with either a "SUCK" or "DOES NOT SUCK" rating. At the conclusion, Miller will announce the final results and the matter will be entirely settled forever, for America. Nobody will ever have to confront this issue again because the answer will be unequivocally decided to a certainty for everyone in the United States and parts of Canada.
WHEN? This event takes place Sunday afternoon. November 20th at Maude's Cafe Patio. The event begins at 4pm.
WHERE? Maude's Cafe Patio (101 SE 2nd Place Gainesville, Florida (the Known Center of the Universe). Rain or shine.
COST? This event is free.
OTHER DETAILS: A professional medic will be on hand throughout the entire six hours in case Mr. Miller suffers any mental or physical issues during the course of this event. There will also be security on hand to protect Mr. Miller from any hostility from The Eagles, or any of their fans or foes until the official decision has been rendered. The Reverend Angeldust (courtesy of the Tabernacle of Hedonism) will conduct a short prayer service before the event.
"They [The Eagles] might suck, but then again, they might be a really terrific band," said Miller. "We won't know until I listen to all the songs on every Eagles studio album and decide once and for all for the great people of this country. There will finally be unity in the land, one way or another."
NOVEMBER 20th is also National Absurdity Day, the perfect day to learn the hard truth about The Eagles!
See this link for more information on NAD:
http://www.nationaldaycalendar.com/national-absurdity-day-november-20/
ABOUT TOM MILLER:
https://millerworks.wordpress.com/about/
Please include this event in your calendar.
# # #
Please include this event in your calendar.
Tom Miller, Wikipedia-listed Gainesville Florida performance artist will be enduring a six-hour marathon of every studio album recorded by The Eagles. At the conclusion, he will decide for America once and for all whether or not The Eagles suck.
"Many people have a strong opinion one way or the other about the Eagles," said Miller, "...and people need to just take a step back and let me decide for them. Only I can decide this for the American people."
Miller cites the following reasons why he alone can make this decision for America:
1.) "I'm a musician, and I know what it takes to write both wonderful and horrible songs. I've done both."
2.) "I'm a Gainesville Florida resident, and one of the founding members of the Eagles was born in Gainesville, Florida, and another member relocated to Gainesville for a time in 1964. This uniquely connects me to whether or not this music sucks."
3.) "Based on my research on Google, nobody has managed to officially sit and listen to all these songs in a row. I'll be the first person in the history of Google to actually actively listen to and evaluate every single Eagles song from all of their official studio albums."
4.) "If I don't make this decision for everyone in America, the fight will continue, but I will take on the struggle if it will accomplish peace. And I am not afraid to endure six hours of The Eagles. In fact, I'm eager to make the sacrifices necessary to subject myself to this band."
Inspired by Donald Trump's "I alone" message, and also the scene in the Coen Brothers film, The Big Lebowski where The Dude is thrown from a taxi cab because he couldn't stand the Eagles, Miller hopes to finally bring to an end the Eagles gridlock which has plagued fans and foes alike.
WHAT? Miller Endures Six Solid Hours of Eagles Music (He will listen to every studio album by The Eagles and render a decision, song by song, tallying each number with either a "SUCK" or "DOES NOT SUCK" rating. At the conclusion, Miller will announce the final results and the matter will be entirely settled forever, for America. Nobody will ever have to confront this issue again because the answer will be unequivocally decided to a certainty for everyone in the United States and parts of Canada.
WHEN? This event takes place Sunday afternoon. November 20th at Maude's Cafe Patio. The event begins at 4pm.
WHERE? Maude's Cafe Patio (101 SE 2nd Place Gainesville, Florida (the Known Center of the Universe). Rain or shine.
COST? This event is free.
OTHER DETAILS: A professional medic will be on hand throughout the entire six hours in case Mr. Miller suffers any mental or physical issues during the course of this event. There will also be security on hand to protect Mr. Miller from any hostility from The Eagles, or any of their fans or foes until the official decision has been rendered. The Reverend Angeldust (courtesy of the Tabernacle of Hedonism) will conduct a short prayer service before the event.
"They [The Eagles] might suck, but then again, they might be a really terrific band," said Miller. "We won't know until I listen to all the songs on every Eagles studio album and decide once and for all for the great people of this country. There will finally be unity in the land, one way or another."
NOVEMBER 20th is also National Absurdity Day, the perfect day to learn the hard truth about The Eagles!
See this link for more information on NAD:
http://www.nationaldaycalendar.com/national-absurdity-day-november-20/
ABOUT TOM MILLER:
https://millerworks.wordpress.com/about/
Please include this event in your calendar.
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