NO HOLDS BARRED FOOD REVIEWS OF GAINESVILLE, FLORIDA RESTAURANTS BY TOM MILLER
UPDATED - 12/20/2013
TODAY'S REVIEW: DAILY GREEN
TODAY'S REVIEW: YUMMY HOUSE
THE RESTAURANTS BELOW ARE TOM MILLER GUARANTEED!
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Tom's 6 Simple Rules for a good restaurant
1. The food shouldn't suck. 2. The staff should treat me like God. 3. Somebody should know something about what they serve. 4. No spots on the glasses, utensils or plates. 5. I shouldn't feel ripped off after I get the check. 6. Food should never resemble vomit. Plate well and garnish. Would a piece of parsley kill ya'? |
The Top Five Best Gainesville Restaurants
1. Paramount Grill - See: MY REVIEW 2. Amelia's - Die for the specials! 3. Mark's Prime - Classic Steakhouse. 4. Saboré - Delightful tapas and atmosphere. 5. Manuel's Vintage Room - Intimate, personal. |
And Highly Recommended For Drinks...
1. Stubbie's T-Shirt Pub
Hide-away beer joint disguised as a T-Shirt store. Only the finest beers here. Knowledgeable staff. Try beers you've never tried. Ask for recommendations. I don't think anyone really buys any T-shirts. Stubbie's and Stein's, a restaurant and drinking expansion of Stubbie's Shirt Pub now lives next door with special food offerings, plus traditional German fare for dinner.
2. Wine & Cheese Gallery
Friday happy hour. Lively, friendly & fun. A little hide-away. Wine everywhere. Outdoor patio seating. Wine tastings on occasion. Go to them. Gourmet items. Also, there is cheese.
3. Lillian's Happy Hour
Find Tom, the silver-haired well dressed bartender and enjoy classic Gainesville and the absolutely BEST martini you'll ever have in a casual setting. Smoking permitted... even cigars.
4. Volta Coffee Tea and Chocolate
Snoot coffee and specialty foods. Chocolate. They are obsessive about coffee and tea. Coffee tastings, art, special events on occasion. Highly recommended.
1. Stubbie's T-Shirt Pub
Hide-away beer joint disguised as a T-Shirt store. Only the finest beers here. Knowledgeable staff. Try beers you've never tried. Ask for recommendations. I don't think anyone really buys any T-shirts. Stubbie's and Stein's, a restaurant and drinking expansion of Stubbie's Shirt Pub now lives next door with special food offerings, plus traditional German fare for dinner.
2. Wine & Cheese Gallery
Friday happy hour. Lively, friendly & fun. A little hide-away. Wine everywhere. Outdoor patio seating. Wine tastings on occasion. Go to them. Gourmet items. Also, there is cheese.
3. Lillian's Happy Hour
Find Tom, the silver-haired well dressed bartender and enjoy classic Gainesville and the absolutely BEST martini you'll ever have in a casual setting. Smoking permitted... even cigars.
4. Volta Coffee Tea and Chocolate
Snoot coffee and specialty foods. Chocolate. They are obsessive about coffee and tea. Coffee tastings, art, special events on occasion. Highly recommended.
Unique Gainesville Classic Drink & Dining Experiences:
The Top - This is THE Classic Gainesville food & drink experience. Quirky, Snooty, Scenesters, Tattoos, Art, great food for vegans and meat-mongers alike!
Maude's Classic Cafe - The Known Center of the Universe.
The Lunchbox - Punks in the plaza making great food for all tastes. Beer & Wine. Entertainment. Outdoor patio seating. And stop lying about the avocados being too expensive or out of season. It's your SIGNATURE DISH, those avocado fries! You can't give a guy this kind of crack for so long and then just take it off the menu. I DEMAND the return of the avocado fries! Wards has avocados on the cheap all year long. SEPTEMBER IS FUCKING CALIFORNIA AVOCADO SEASON, GOD DAMNIT! P.S. Love the outdoor entertainment. When can I play a show?
Emiliano's - Great brunch on Saturdays/Sundays - FANTASTIC Mojitos!
Southern Charm - Fuck Paula Deen and eat here.
Big Lou's Pizza - NY Style Pizza. Best thin crust in town, great salads, daily specials.
Burrito Brothers - They fly these things out around the country. When there's guac, get guac!
La Pasadita Mexican Grill - Seriously authentic fresh Mexican food with the worst service possible, but go anyway. It rocks.
Maude's Classic Cafe - The Known Center of the Universe.
The Lunchbox - Punks in the plaza making great food for all tastes. Beer & Wine. Entertainment. Outdoor patio seating. And stop lying about the avocados being too expensive or out of season. It's your SIGNATURE DISH, those avocado fries! You can't give a guy this kind of crack for so long and then just take it off the menu. I DEMAND the return of the avocado fries! Wards has avocados on the cheap all year long. SEPTEMBER IS FUCKING CALIFORNIA AVOCADO SEASON, GOD DAMNIT! P.S. Love the outdoor entertainment. When can I play a show?
Emiliano's - Great brunch on Saturdays/Sundays - FANTASTIC Mojitos!
Southern Charm - Fuck Paula Deen and eat here.
Big Lou's Pizza - NY Style Pizza. Best thin crust in town, great salads, daily specials.
Burrito Brothers - They fly these things out around the country. When there's guac, get guac!
La Pasadita Mexican Grill - Seriously authentic fresh Mexican food with the worst service possible, but go anyway. It rocks.
The Poop List - Worst Gainesville Restaurants to Avoid at All Costs!
If your restaurant is on the Poop List, you suck and will hopefully straighten up or go out of business. 90% of former poop list members have closed their doors, because I called it right. The others, I have removed from the list for 2013 and I plan to revisit these restaurants in the near future. May your restaurant be successful because you have passion and you care. May financial reward be a by-product of commitment and excellence to good food and making people happy.
KC CRAVE
KC CRAVE
